马上注册，结交更多好友，享用更多功能，让你轻松玩转社区。
您需要 登录 才可以下载或查看，没有账号？注册
x
本帖最后由 匿名 于 2011-5-9 12:03 编辑
刚看到的，如果我又火星了，请轻拍啦！
中文版在最下面翻译的非常非常给力，但为了防止影响大家食欲，特此隐藏。
大家看了中文版以后觉得搞笑，也像其他JMS一样说声哈！
居然30楼了，特此粘贴，热线精彩反馈集锦！！
哈哈哈，笑死了
Judyvision__DE 发表于 2011-4-13 19:32 
太经典了!!
荷包蛋MM 发表于 2011-3-2 16:40
翻译得太给力了。。。
Müller-Dumont 发表于 2011-1-28 23:57
太搞笑了！中文看完我就乐翻了！
cutepuppy 发表于 2011-1-29 05:52
笑死我了
仙人掌拍仙人球 发表于 2011-1-29 08:45
说实话，看得挺过瘾的
鱼之乐 发表于 2011-1-29 14:44
扫完英文，看了中文最后部分
那啥，谁让老外毛多
木哈哈哈哈～～～～～～
nightdream 发表于 2011-1-29 16:45
乐得眼泪，都留出来了
带面具的猫 发表于 2011-1-29 19:44
我看成是腋毛了
街头一片雪 发表于 2011-1-30 15:02
有时候，我望着窗外沉思，为什么我不跳下去呢！！！！！
乖乖兔 发表于 2011-1-30 15:52
把我眼泪都笑出来了！
xst666 发表于 2011-1-31 14:42
这也就老外这样吧。。。。
ADW 发表于 2011-2-1 10:59
笑s我了！！！
啊怪 发表于 2011-2-12 20:01
有这种毛的吗
viola.wei 发表于 2011-2-24 13:05
这个人肯定很胖
rani 发表于 2011-3-4 15:05
翻译的太给力了
乐呵呵的生活 发表于 2011-3-3 14:25
中文版果真翻译的相当精彩！！
monikawang 发表于 2011-3-27 01:54
老外最近一个很火的文章，STOP! Before you do, read this. You may change your mind.
I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to all though tasteless, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble pooping. No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique.
It seems my ass-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my asscheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling.
Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with somepaper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold. I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey, this is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea.
I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my ass of hair. Occasionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn babe. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My ass was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over.
Little did I know. I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two asscheeks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I
thought, it would dry. Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic poop -molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky poop/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there
and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm. Unfortunately, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally
reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my ass off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks.
As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering poop/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my ass cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own poop blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks." Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my ass at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for ass-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my asscheeks.
Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil. As if that wasn't
enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your ass having the texture of a brillo pad.
Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony.
Friends-DON'T SHAVE YOUR ASS-HAIR!
中文版，恨给力，但为了防止影响大家食欲，特此隐藏
|
[复制链接]
匿名
发表于 2011-1-28 23:42
简体中文
繁體中文
English
Deutsch
