Funny English

eugenwen11

1.Why are girls afraid of the letter C ?
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Because it makes fat fact!
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( Q9 I# l) W% s0 ~; X3 Q2.Why is the letter E so important?
Because it’s the begining of everything!
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3.Why are the letter G and letter S in “gloves” close to each other?
- P/ a* l! ?: l) i* s% \, fBecause there is love between them!
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4.What letter is an animal ?
3 ?0 Z0 a0 W' D. E, d3 c! q2 o+ m+ ]It’s the letter B
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& T! v! d. Q. h. a! v5.What letter is a question?
It’s the letter Y

6.Why is U the jolliest letter?
Because it’s in the midst of fun!
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" d: Y5 x6 ^$ }4 v9 H# D7.How do you feel today?
, c! E7 z2 a, ~% G% i7 K" rWith my hands ,of course!
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- B9 R- K' W, v; ^8.How can you make a rope shorter without cutting or winding it?
Take a longer rope and compare with it!
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9.Why do people wish for something they haven’t got?
What else is there to wish for? You cease to wish for it once you get it!
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10.What can you tell from Peter’s record card with extremely poor grades?
He didn’t cheat!

) R, o% J/ H& S) j1 ^11.What does everybody do at the same time?
Grow old!

The following question you'd better guess by yourselves firstly, then find the answers
6 w1 Y; N7 g6 s; X' Y3 H. f9 ?at the end!!!
) d3 A! Q0 u1 |/ b* u$ t( c8 w7 C+ p12.What resembles half a pie?
13.Who works only one day in a year but never gets fired?
14.When do people have two mouth?
15.Why do lions eat raw meat?
16.How many sides does a circle have?
17.What animal can jump as high as a tree?
+ A: H9 u' i" m+ {; M; N8 G18.How can you be completely sleepless for seven days and still lack no rest?
/ Z+ B/ P/ L3 K' s0 A* O19.Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
% q/ s6 h$ K" }20.If you throw a stone into the Red Sea,what will it become?
+ v5 s% J: P+ p: t+ z. c5 v21.If two’s company and three’s crowd,what’s four and five?
9 _# c9 V& D5 o8 ~22.The farmers in this village used modern methods but harvested no apples this year ,why?
2 m! V5 Y7 P7 ~6 K7 @23.The injured dog had some difficulty going home.Every step he took, he slipped back two.However,he still managed to get home. How did he do it?If you throw a stone into the Red Sea,what will it become?
24.What falls often but never gts hurt?
% j8 F' }8 ^. V  C0 J8 I0 `) k25.How did the pick-pocket spot the plain-clothes cop in his woman’s disguise?
1 s" v0 l2 C9 t$ E; }" n26.Which month has 28 days?
- U" c6 m, j% O  B; B27.What is it that everyone wants to have and get rid of too?
28.where did the egg floating down the Mississippi River come from?
29.Lucky Mouse fell off a 1000-step stair and was not hurt.why?
30.Why do giraffes have long neck?
- W- O/ Z; U: v31.How can you make 6 out of three 7′s?
32.How can you make 6 out of three 5′s?
$ Z0 @- E5 m/ I; `. _/ @33.how can you make 1000 out of eight 8′s?
7 F2 z. \, N, [9 T! [3 V" z34.Can you name the captital of every state in the U.S. in ten seconds?
35.A police officer had a brother ,but the brother had no brother.How could that be?
. z' I* F7 p, _0 U36.Why does a cat look first to one side and then to the other side when it enters a room?
$ h1 k( F3 \" d+ _37.How do you know policemen are strong ?
38.With which hand do you write?
39.What must you do before you return a book to the library?
Answers:
  K5 E# A$ m' w. s* A1.
2.Because it’s the begining of everything!
3.
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5. !
6.
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8.
9.
10.
11.
# b3 E$ x9 J' }4 a! z( C12. The other half!
13. Santa Claus 圣诞老人
14. When there’s two of them 有两个人时!
15. They don’t know how to cook 他们不知道如何烹饪!
2 T& I8 c0 G* F1 J  d16. Two. The inside and the outside!
  }( P- N4 K* |: o4 ?" S17. All animals,for trees can’t jump!
4 B% l# f: P3 T' {' v& L18. Sleep at night!
3 O. ~, \# L0 F6 H0 b, @. {0 R* Y19. At the bottom!
$ B. Q; _: `: a9 m5 V9 \* o20. Wet!
21. Nine!
6 q5 O+ ]! R& Y  p7 x3 Y" `* ^8 J3 z22. They planted peech trees!
23. He walked in the other direction!
24. Snowflakes!
25.He passed by a cosmetics store without looking in the window!
26. Every month has at least 28 days!
/ v- S3 z/ _: L  w27. One’s appetite!
28.From a hen!
6 a7 N& ~  c' w29. He fell off the last step!
30. Because their heads are far from their bodies!
31.easy . 7- 7/7=6!
0 w  o4 [  Y0 o) @# d* K5 ?5 i2 [! o# c32. easy. 5+5/5=6!
33. easy. 8+8+8+8+88+888=1000!
! d8 }, h0 b: i34.Washinton,D.C.!
6 A  f3 h. z( Z. k35. The police officer was a lady!
/ e# J+ l0 p# \) y36.Because it can’t see both sides at once.
+ h  ]5 Z9 @5 N8 o37.Because they can hold up traffic with just one hand!
38. Neither.I use a pen!
39.Borrow the book from library.

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