Funny English

eugenwen11

1.Why are girls afraid of the letter C ?

: J* v/ }7 b& t) Z. P5 Q3 YBecause it makes fat fact!
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2.Why is the letter E so important?
Because it’s the begining of everything!
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* n$ ~: ]7 ^( ]0 D- k/ r( j3.Why are the letter G and letter S in “gloves” close to each other?
Because there is love between them!

  A1 o+ |9 P4 F! r' |! K  x/ P4.What letter is an animal ?
It’s the letter B
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5.What letter is a question?
It’s the letter Y

5 |9 y% v6 u7 z2 v# }5 Y6.Why is U the jolliest letter?
Because it’s in the midst of fun!

7.How do you feel today?
With my hands ,of course!

0 l( q1 w' D, c# x# ?$ E8.How can you make a rope shorter without cutting or winding it?
0 L1 X8 ]' W. _Take a longer rope and compare with it!

9.Why do people wish for something they haven’t got?
% O& Z& o7 ]& o: Z, @ What else is there to wish for? You cease to wish for it once you get it!

3 D4 g- Z/ x; l- R3 z- g8 f10.What can you tell from Peter’s record card with extremely poor grades?
He didn’t cheat!
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% S) M8 G' w! A0 |1 x' Y5 F11.What does everybody do at the same time?
Grow old!

$ t  v5 l% T  aThe following question you'd better guess by yourselves firstly, then find the answers
! o! \& f/ g/ ^! |at the end!!!
12.What resembles half a pie?
13.Who works only one day in a year but never gets fired?
0 `; m. c! e% R$ q14.When do people have two mouth?
15.Why do lions eat raw meat?
/ ^/ w4 d2 g1 ]* B" n- O16.How many sides does a circle have?
) U9 g$ M5 B7 e5 I7 f) ?17.What animal can jump as high as a tree?
18.How can you be completely sleepless for seven days and still lack no rest?
; W6 i/ \% K, L% z/ e4 n19.Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
, B5 P7 F, x; Q2 J) ]20.If you throw a stone into the Red Sea,what will it become?
21.If two’s company and three’s crowd,what’s four and five?
8 r1 \* k! ?# Y; [2 P22.The farmers in this village used modern methods but harvested no apples this year ,why?
+ S) }+ E. \, ^* B3 ?% r23.The injured dog had some difficulty going home.Every step he took, he slipped back two.However,he still managed to get home. How did he do it?If you throw a stone into the Red Sea,what will it become?
24.What falls often but never gts hurt?
25.How did the pick-pocket spot the plain-clothes cop in his woman’s disguise?
26.Which month has 28 days?
* e- l: r) p9 G% x" t5 Q27.What is it that everyone wants to have and get rid of too?
28.where did the egg floating down the Mississippi River come from?
29.Lucky Mouse fell off a 1000-step stair and was not hurt.why?
30.Why do giraffes have long neck?
31.How can you make 6 out of three 7′s?
32.How can you make 6 out of three 5′s?
1 B# y! B* r* S( f33.how can you make 1000 out of eight 8′s?
34.Can you name the captital of every state in the U.S. in ten seconds?
7 c. a, \" S* H$ n. t9 \35.A police officer had a brother ,but the brother had no brother.How could that be?
8 E3 q. H( E, e9 d8 d36.Why does a cat look first to one side and then to the other side when it enters a room?
37.How do you know policemen are strong ?
# h& a! {/ k# L% J38.With which hand do you write?
39.What must you do before you return a book to the library?
# v3 h( X2 ^* k# uAnswers:
  b2 \1 \( J/ |5 k1.
' D- \( [* p5 f! `* c2.Because it’s the begining of everything!
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4. !
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0 I" W/ P( m/ |& l, o& J% Z. ]- s6.
7.
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10.
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12. The other half!
13. Santa Claus 圣诞老人
/ b; w: \+ e7 D/ l" b14. When there’s two of them 有两个人时!
15. They don’t know how to cook 他们不知道如何烹饪!
16. Two. The inside and the outside!
17. All animals,for trees can’t jump!
18. Sleep at night!
19. At the bottom!
20. Wet!
& M* w: U( ]/ Z+ k$ L/ X21. Nine!
5 |2 W/ E' c) }/ w) N7 T5 D2 w$ Z22. They planted peech trees!
) p; v$ L7 U9 U8 |' B* N23. He walked in the other direction!
24. Snowflakes!
& w) L! h5 C" y. c/ b) Q25.He passed by a cosmetics store without looking in the window!
26. Every month has at least 28 days!
27. One’s appetite!
, V; `& a( c" _28.From a hen!
6 g9 F" l) \9 D- L" Y% X29. He fell off the last step!
. X8 @- ^" A* J% w" C30. Because their heads are far from their bodies!
2 Y6 z' K7 x: C# k# g' I31.easy . 7- 7/7=6!
9 |. L* w0 X% j3 t2 W% T32. easy. 5+5/5=6!
33. easy. 8+8+8+8+88+888=1000!
$ i& J# Z# D  w4 o! _; G34.Washinton,D.C.!
6 T. A' O" y; m" J35. The police officer was a lady!
* s- h/ F& w: p* u# J$ y/ `+ S, m36.Because it can’t see both sides at once.
37.Because they can hold up traffic with just one hand!
$ E9 W' I- }( d38. Neither.I use a pen!
* v/ v3 \, k  P. y+ y39.Borrow the book from library.

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